BIN LADEN DEAD: Thanks to Our Will and Kate

THE death of the world’s most wanted man, Osama Bin Laden, only days after the Royal Wedding is not coincidence, sources have revealed. Experts believe the wedding of Our Will and Kate has brought a new found peace to the world, leaving no room for despots and terrorists.

CALM BEFORE STORM: UK about to poop itself

The Wedding of Our Will and Kate will be watched by an estimated two billion people around the globe and VEXNEWS will be one of them, bringing you the latest from a pub in East London most possibly near, or literally on, Brick Lane.

STICKER SHOCKER: Where’s the chewy?

THE finest royal collectables on the planet are now available on the streets of London. Everyone from the most discerning buyer to the most American of tourists can pick up anything their hearts desires with Our Will and Kate’s mug on them – including mugs, if that takes their fancy. VEXNEWS has been bitterly disappointed with its first and last royal memento buy as London correspondent David Saunderson reports.

RUFF TIMES: Monsters battle for Our Kate’s soul

POP sensation Justin Bieber will mediate between feuding UK vampire and werewolf factions in the hope of averting a supernatural war that could unhinge the Royal Wedding in London next week.

RED KEN: “BoJo is losing his grip on tube”

WHINY London diddums were “trapped” on a broken underground train for a whole hour this morning in temperatures as high as 30C plus. The incident, which the London Evening Standard stopped short of comparing to the Tokyo Nuclear Disaster, inconvenienced and upset thousands of commuters on their way to work.

BEWARE: Prediction spells doom for Royals

Dark and unholy magic has correctly predicted a rift in the Middleton clan, possibly threatening the Royal Wedding and the loves and hopes of billions of people across the globe reports London correspondent David Saunderson.

ROYAL IGNORANCE: All is we know is that we knowing nothing

Our London correspondent David Saunderson is showing Brit scribes how it’s done in his brilliant investigations into the Royal Wedding. Does he even go so far as to try on a speculative copy of the official gown?

WHERE’S THE LOVE? Bunny boiler madness threatens Royal Wedding

Anarchist attacks on the Royal Wedding are the least of Our Will and Kate’s problems, an exclusive VEXNEWS investigation by our London correspondent David Saunderson has revealed.

COMPETITION LICKED: Vexnews scores Royal Mail stamp of approval

AUSTRALIAN web patriot Andrew Landeryou will be honoured on a British postage stamp.

The VEXNEWS chief, who has been liken to a young Rupert Murdoch or an much older Robert Maxwell, will be seen an a limited edition “first class” stamp soon to be released by the Royal Mail. The stamp will honour Landeryou for his unrelenting promotion of freedom and merciless upholding of public morals and standards through his popular VEXNEWS.com web site.