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NO-NAME: Stat dec accusing PM of getting $5K cash was illegally sworn by anono-lawyer

StatdecirregularIn all the excitement of hunting down the imagined criminal past of the Prime Minister, it appears laws have been broken. Tsk. Tsk.

The Australian’s website contains a copy of a statutory declaration by a former union official, Wayne Hem, sworn on Remembrance Day 2012.[pdf]

The person who witnessed the stat dec holds themselves out as an “Australian legal practitioner at Kelly Hazell Quill solicitors”.

VEXNEWS readers will recall that the firm works for News Limited in Melbourne and while we have no beef with them at all, they did have the unpleasant task of initiating defamation proceedings against us on behalf of the Herald Sun’s poisonous midget loser columnist Alan Howe, who we understand is paid $250,000 per annum for writing a weekly column that is chock full of stupidity and racism and doing precious little else. Some had hoped the extravagance of keeping such an overpaid dilettante on the payroll would be curtailed in light of the deep and controversial cuts being made by News CEO Kim Williams but no such luck as yet. Rarely is loyalty a curse, but HWT’s highly regarded el supremo Peter Blunden’s loyalty to the unemployable and useless ex-editor is not commendable, especially when editorial costs are being in unprecedented and undoubtedly essential ways.

History shows that the perpetually angry, bitter and vengeful dweeb Howe withdrew his defamation claim, acknowledging the truth of all VEXNEWS has ever said about the little man who occasionally wears red pants and has had occasion to leave company cars parked without using the handbrake causing them to fall off cliffs or down mountainsides or some such.

The involvement of the media law firm in assisting Mr Hem suggests they might be providing further legal services to him, although company sources thought that unlikely when we inquired.

Anyway, VEXNEWS can exclusively reveal that Kelly Hazell Quill’s legal practitioner appears to have committed an offence, breaking section 109 of the Evidence (Miscellaneous Provisions) Act 1998, according to legal experts consulted by us today.

While the unnamed person has put what appears to be their signature on the stat dec and has supplied his or her address, they have not legibly written their own name as required by section 109. Oops:

109. Name and address of person witnessing declaration to appear on

After witnessing the signing of a declaration, the person by whom it is
witnessed must legibly write, type or stamp his or her name and address below
his or her own signature. Penalty: 1 penalty unit.

The Australian, quick to judge the poor old PM in their repeated reporting on the embezzlement conspiracy theory tale to which they have dedicated enough space to land a jumbo jet, has some tricky issues of its own to face in relation to the unlawful swearing of the statutory declaration.

Did they know an offence had been committed in swearing the stat dec?

If they did know, did they engage in a cover-up?

Having been so informed of this rather worrying situation by their friends at VEXNEWS, will they immediately report the matter to Police for urgent investigation?

If not, why not?

The same breathless questions might well be put to the Deputy Opposition Leader, Julie Bishop. Bishop is certainly vulnerable after massively over-reaching on these issues and accusing the PM of criminal behaviour without evidence and while consorting with Ralph Blewitt, whose activities we have lavishly chronicled here. The only thing that might have saved here was one silly Labor MP calling her a “bimbo” – an act of stupidity that probably would have caused an international scandal had a Coalition MP so slagged the PM.

These questions are obviously inspired by the Woodward&Bernstein style enthusiasm for scalp-hunting we have seen in the Gillard slush fund embezzlement conspiracy saga.

Australian politics has been stuck on stupid for weeks and weeks about this. It’s time we moved on.


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  1. I read on Wikipedia that Andrew Landeryou, who runs this site, “has been active in the past in the Labor Party, and particularly the Labor Right faction”. No wonder this site is always throwing mud on Julia Gillard’s critics

    Posted by danbo | November 28, 2012, 13:47
  2. How many penalty units does “creating a false document” attract?
    Up to 10 years’ worth?

    Posted by LeftRightOut | November 28, 2012, 16:01
  3. Its okay, let them go. They are a big law firm and people working for such are never prosecuted.

    Private middle class citizens however are another story, they are always fined and prosecuted for the most trivial of “offenses”.

    Posted by Let big law firms go. | November 28, 2012, 17:12
  4. The Primeminister was born in Kenya and grew up with Barak Obama. That’s why they are so close. If they look closely she is not event a citizen.

    Posted by Public Scandle | November 29, 2012, 7:26
  5. Come to think of it, Juliar/bitch/witch/ditch/Screaming Banshee Gillard has never produced her long form birth certificate. How can I be sure she is a real person?

    Posted by Uncle Buck | November 30, 2012, 1:26
  6. Tony Abbott and Julie Bishop were raised by baboons in Kenya.

    Posted by H the B | November 30, 2012, 10:12
  7. I would enjoy a big male baboon

    Posted by Cr.Craig | December 1, 2012, 0:12
  8. According to Senator George Brandy Arse, the punctuation mistakes in Julia Gillard’s letters are so serious he is thinking of bringing back the death penalty. Criminal offences have been committed, and Senator Brandy Arse is a barrister, so there.

    Posted by wothers | December 1, 2012, 0:55
  9. There is no doubt that the Australian legal practitioner who witnessed the affixing of the signature of the deponent to the declaration has rushed the attestation and botched it in the process. The offence created by section 109 is arguably not one of strict liability but quite possibly one requiring intent.

    The appropriate sanction would be a report to the Legal Services Commissioner or an admonishment by the Legal Services Board for not taking due care over such a serious obligation as witnessing the signature of a deponent.

    Australian lawyers holding a practising certificate ought be held to a higher standard.

    Posted by Giuseppe De Simone | December 4, 2012, 20:43
  10. One penalty unit is around $180 because Robert Clark, Attorney-General and Minister for Finance, broke the indexation nexus between the penalty unit and the fee unit which used to both increase by the CPI and jacked up the penalty unit on 1 July by a whopping 30% or so.

    The penalty of one penalty unit is a maximum for the offence so it is not regarded as particularly serious. The most likely penalty for a first time offender would be a good behaviour bond or even a diversion program.

    The maximum penalty for production or use of a false document is a level 5 imprisonment (10 years) as it is an indictable offence in the Crimes Act (Vic) 1958 at section 83A.

    Posted by Giuseppe De Simone | December 4, 2012, 20:50
  11. Let’s have a whip-around and buy the poor firm a rubber stamp.

    Even Julia had one back in the 90s.

    Posted by Disillusioned | December 13, 2012, 11:57
  12. WHY is Julia STILL refusing to hold a media inquiry into bloody Rupert? His mum is dead so she will not be embarassed by what a bastard her son is

    Posted by Nyall Hopman | December 15, 2012, 9:35
  13. Dean, didn’t you fix her gate once?

    Posted by Jimmysmatesmate | December 17, 2012, 21:24


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