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TED DEFIED: Baillieu loyalists McIntosh and Shardey face preselection challenges

andymac The leadership of current state Liberal leader Ted Baillieu could be defied with contests looming in two safe seats in direct breach of his loudly stated desires.

Rumours are swirling in Liberal circles that highly regarded Costello loyalist Kelly O’Dwyer will be nominating for Kew, in defiance of Ted Baillieu’s order that the lazy member there Andrew McIntosh (pictured left) will be defended at all costs. McIntosh is the shadow minister for Police.

“Macca” is damned by O’Dwyer supporters as a “useless nob” who allegedly claims that he “works from home” on Fridays. The four day work-week had only previously been achieved in the People’s Republic of France and in the imagining of Victorian Trades Hall boss Brian Boyd, yet McIntosh has achieved this workers’ nirvana in our lifetime. Kudos.

One party insider concerned about the direction of the party under Red Ted told VEXNEWS “If Frydenberg wins as expected, they”ll be irresistible pressure to make a change in Kew. And if Kelly is interested, she’d clearly be a stand-out, would almost certainly have the numbers and would be front-bench material from day one. I cannot tell you how highly regarded she is, it’s crazy to have useless nobs like McIntosh in and talent like O’Dwyer out.”

In addition, the well-preserved yet ageing doctor’s wife and Shadow Health Minister Helen “Chardonnay” Shardey has also been under strict instructions from the Liberal leader to stay on. Shardey was once a close personal friend of former federal Health minister Michael Wooldridge but is believed to have moved on.

However, sources familiar with the situation in the safe Liberal seat of Caulfield say that local power-broker and cake-merchant Frank Greenstein has given the nod for a change of representation in the seat. The all-powerful Greenstein is probably the closest thing the Liberals currently have to a local ALP warlord. Greenstein has been known to hear a South African accent for as much as two blocks away and then swoops on the accent-holder with a smile on his face, a lovely cake and Liberal party membership form in each hand. He gets few knock-backs and the local branches are teeming with South Africans aplenty whose principal political aspiration is to do Frank’s bidding after “porking the cor” outside his cakeshop.


And Frank’s bidding is to find a new MP for Caulfield. We hear that the warlord has picked the  heir to the vacuum cleaner fortune and some-time DJ at local barmitzvahs, David Southwick.

While some had hoped the shrewd lobbyist Jason Aldworth would put up his hand, he has deferred to his former client Southwick’s claim. It is said that Aldworth charged the lad a small fortune to run campaigns for him in the next. Southwick has been the candidate in Melbourne Ports, was cleaned up by Labor’s formidable Michael Danby, and was also the third candidate for the Libs in Southern Metro where he very narrowly beat Labor’s Evan Thornley who found selling electric car batteries a more compelling prospect than being the state’s Industry minister in the midst of an investment drought. Southwick is regarded as a bit strange but Thornley’s mid-life crisis exceeded all others. The DJ’s fundraising capacity is beyond dispute and he would help re-connect the Liberals with the seat’s Jewish community, many of whom still regard Shardey as a bit clueless after she served local rabbis a platter of sandwiches that included ham at a function in her office. Oops.

From Ted’s point of view, McIntosh and Shardey are loyal votes for his leadership and his faction. Southwick and O’Dwyer would not be, aligned to the Kroger group as they are. So regardless of the need for generational change, Baillieu is opposing them and is begging the uninterested duo to stay on for just one more round. If the rumours are corrected, their time and Ted’s is up.


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  1. Soon it will be Disco time in Caulfield.


    Posted by DJ Disco Dave | June 3, 2009, 17:20
  2. “Talent” seems to be very much in the eye of beholder if this word is to be used in the same sentence as Kelly O’Dwyer’s name.

    Posted by Anonski | June 3, 2009, 17:24
  3. Choo choo!

    Posted by Choo Choo | June 3, 2009, 17:25
  4. Macca is the member for Kew. Kew was within the old seat of East Yarra. RDR was the member for East Yarra. Macca must therefore explain what his connection was to RDR. If it was a strong connection, he must be removed.

    Posted by There is something wrong in Victoria, ie Richard Dalla Riva | June 3, 2009, 17:40
  5. yo DJ, spin that wheel!

    Posted by botox is not a bad word... | June 3, 2009, 18:25
  6. What the hell is wrong with ‘There is something wrong in Victoria ie Richard Dalla Riva’, are you some kind of ALP candidate standing against him, or are you a Liberal member trying to destablise factional warfare? It honestly doesn’t make sense!

    Posted by Dark Horse | June 3, 2009, 18:41
  7. Helen you are always welcome under my silk sheets, just like old times.

    Posted by Dr Wooldridge | June 3, 2009, 19:16
  8. The question for all dark horses is not whether there is something wrong with There is something wrong in Victoria ie Richard Dalla Riva’, but whether there is something wrong in Victoria. The ansewr to that question you will find is Richard Dalla Riva.

    Posted by There is something wrong in Victoria, ie Richard Dalla Riva | June 3, 2009, 19:33
  9. What is all this Richard Dalla Riva stuff. For the past week or so, there have been about a hundred negative posts about him. Is this the beginning of a campaign agaist him by his Liberal colleagues. Obviously the reforms were about cleaning out sitting mps. does this mean Dalla Riva was at the top of the so-called ‘hit list’. I thought it was Kim Wells and Andrew Mcintosh who were in the firing line, and that RDR was safe. Obviously not.

    Posted by Anonymous | June 3, 2009, 19:36
  10. I just tried to ‘mount’ this poster’s daughter that’s all!

    Posted by RDR | June 3, 2009, 19:38
  11. Has David Southwick ever been at a DJ attended by Richard Dalla Riva? If he has not, then he is a good candidate and Greenstein is a good man for supporting him. If he has, then serious questions need top be asked about all parties.

    Posted by There is something wrong in Victoria, ie Richard Dalla Riva | June 3, 2009, 19:48
  12. You’re an idiot.

    No wonder nobody takes you seriously. You almost as bad as Tim Holding, Lynne Koscky, Joe Helper, Justin Madden…this list of incompetent Ministers goes on….

    Posted by Dark Horse | June 3, 2009, 20:38
  13. So funny!! I can’t stop laughing just because of the anime pic!!
    I think I will quote it in my own Blog!!ah ah ah! ;)

    Posted by Eva | June 3, 2009, 20:53
  14. RDR is a creepy weirdo. The libs should dump if they want to have any credibilty re integrity

    Posted by Patriot | June 3, 2009, 21:45
  15. There is something wrong in Victoria
    ie Richard Dalla Riva
    He is so sleazy with the young lasses
    And has no support amongst the Easter Metro masses
    There is something wrong in Victoria
    ie Richard Dalla Riva

    Posted by Goose | June 3, 2009, 23:26
  16. “If Frydenberg wins as expected”?

    Expected by who? Idiots, perhaps?

    Frydenberg has always been behind the eight ball in Kooyong. Even his reference from the PM is viewed with suspicion.

    Pesutto is comfortably ahead. Some key Josh supporters are fearful of a Pesutto first round victory.

    Posted by Anonski | June 3, 2009, 23:46
  17. What crazy MULCer fuc#tard came up with this comment:

    “And if Kelly is interested, she’d clearly be a stand-out, would almost certainly have the numbers and would be front-bench material from day one. I cannot tell you how highly regarded she is…”

    Posted by Anon | June 4, 2009, 0:31
  18. Liberals heed my cry. Dump RDR while you still have a shred of credibility clinging to you like so many tattered rags. He is nothing but a koud arrogant sleaze merchant who was a third rate copper

    Posted by Harry Giandaris | June 4, 2009, 0:39
  19. Would bone Kelly O’Dwyer
    Ooooo yeahhhhhhhh

    Posted by Ooooooo Yeahhhhh Dig It? | June 4, 2009, 2:29
  20. Landeryou, Brokenleftleg is Iain Lygo, a failed greens candidate, failed journalist, failed Surfworld employee and failed blogger – his rants only attract hits from about seven dumb hippies and some right-thinkers who enjoy laughing at spastics.

    Posted by Brokenelftnutcase | June 4, 2009, 8:48
  21. why is the Liberal Party forgetting one of their best operatives going around, Lorraine Wreford who is a current serving councillor on the City of Casey.???

    Posted by Berwick Resident | June 4, 2009, 9:14
  22. To Anon at 0:31 …

    I think their name is Kelly.

    Posted by Dark horse | June 4, 2009, 9:26
  23. Justin Madden was censured. he is in the same house of parliament as Richard Dalla Riva. he should be censuresd for that fact alone. every member o fthe upper house must put on the record their dealings and relationship with Richard Dalla Riva.

    Posted by There is something wrong in Victoria, ie Richard Dalla Riva | June 4, 2009, 9:30
  24. Goose, I think you meant to refer to the “Eastern Metro masses”, rather than the “Easter Metro masses”. Unless Easter Metro masses was a sophisticated reference to the strong Christian community in Eastern Metro, who would no doubt want to see RDR out of State Parliament.

    Posted by Dr Dre | June 4, 2009, 9:34
  25. The Liberal Party needs ministerial material in both seats. Southwick, lovely bloke that he is, is not ministerial material.

    Posted by Steven Sensible | June 4, 2009, 9:57
  26. Andy – are all the anti-RDR comments across VEX from the same IP address? The troll needs to stick to the topic.

    Posted by Epstein's Mother | June 4, 2009, 10:47
  27. Who’s this chap who owns a cake shop and why was I not notified? I am very talented at using delicious treats to tickle the temptations of prospective members of the Liberal Party. My son, a very important local councillor, and I are going to have to pay Mr Greenstein a visit.

    Posted by Inga | June 4, 2009, 10:55
  28. Dear Constituents
    Unfortunately I have recently been diagnosed with a raging case of swine flu. Rumours that I contracted the virus through swilling large amounts of bacon are mostly inaccurate. I thank you for your patience during this difficult time, and would invite you to come and enjoy a nice ham sandwich at my office and discuss why I am such a spectacular fuck up.
    Yours in delicious bacony goodness,
    Helen Shardey MP

    Posted by Shards | June 4, 2009, 11:04
  29. Steven Sensible you are an arsehat. Anyone who thinks Southwick’s career consists of being a DJ is seriously deluded. He’s smart & has built several successful businesses, much, much more than most other potential candidates have done or will ever do. He has a lecturing gig & runs marketing courses for major Asian corporations, as well as being actively involved in several charitable organisations. And, unlike most other potentials, he is genuinely interested in politics as a means to improve things, not a route to a cushy pension with a little light self-aggrandisement along the way.

    Posted by Astounded of Melbourne | June 4, 2009, 11:15
  30. Dear Astounded of Melbourne,
    Does he also like puppies? Because if he doesn’t like puppies we ain’t buying.

    Posted by Caulfield Patriots Association | June 4, 2009, 11:33
  31. Disco time!

    Posted by DJ Diso Dave | June 4, 2009, 12:52
  32. Dave is many things, and I have nothing but fondness for him, and very much wish he had knocked off Danby and Thornley in previous elections. But Caulfield is a prize seat (one of the 17 not to fall to Labor in 2002), and should be held by someone with ministerial potential.

    I’m not saying it is currently, but that is what the thinking should be, and neither Southwick or Aldworth are ministerial material. Which is sad for the Liberal Party.

    Posted by Steven Sensible | June 4, 2009, 16:05
  33. The only reason Caulfield was retained in 2002 was Frank Greenstein. Without him there would have been no money, no campaign, virtually no booths manned on polling day. The Liberal vote increased in 2004 because of the combined efforts of Frank & David & Kaye Farrow, who between them marshalled the funds & the people to run an effective campaign. Frank & David know how to get people on side to support the cause, a talent sadly lacking in any of the wannabe blow-ins. Planning, strategy, ability to cut to the chase, capacity for hard work & thinking things through, plus people skills are all indispensible characteristics of minister material. David has them. There are umpteen lawyer types who haven’t lifted a finger in previous campaigns who fancy their chances in Caulfield. People who have lived overseas for the past few years. People who wouldn’t hand out how to votes in Caulfield in 2004 or the federal contest in 2007 because they didn’t want to be seen to be political in the run up to the local council elections. People who live in Brighton & are members in Kooyong. None of them deserve a passing glance at preselection time. There are also rumours of some sitting MPs who are past their use-by date, & who would never have had a chance of getting even a parly sec gig under Kennett, eyeing off Caulfield. The local Libs will know what to make of them.

    Posted by Astounded of Melbourne | June 4, 2009, 19:32
  34. and i’m sure he likes puppies lol

    Posted by Astounded of Melbourne | June 4, 2009, 19:33
  35. make that 2004 2006

    Posted by Astounded of Melbourne | June 4, 2009, 22:41
  36. Since Kelly O’Dwyer has been helping Costello in his Higgins campaigns he has only gone backwards. And has the numbers? pfft. But she will get mummy’s vote.

    Posted by Lord help us. | June 5, 2009, 0:19
  37. Cheers Astounded for outing yourself.

    David’s campaign in 2004 was successful due to his enormous energy, and of course Frank’s, but was held back by the campaign being focussed on Caulfield, where people voted Liberal more anyway, and largely ignored Albert Park, where in many areas (Middle Park, Elwood, St Kilda), the Liberal vote went backwards.

    Posted by Steven Sensible | June 9, 2009, 10:09
  38. Garbage. There was action throughout the electorate. The fact is that Albert Park is stuffed full of quintessential champagne socialists & although the demographic is shifting, it’s unlikely to move substantially any time soon. The watermelon vote is also a killer in Albert Park as a whole.

    Posted by Astounded of Melbourne | June 12, 2009, 17:56
  39. Well, Astounded, I’m just going to have to assume you were there during the campaign and saw what happened.

    Posted by Steven Sensible | June 15, 2009, 9:34
  40. Aldworth decided not to use the anti greens flier in Southwick’s 2004 campaign,which negated the money and manpower spent on the campaign. No one coudl waste aq seat like Higgins on Aldsworth who woudl be better suited to Gorton.

    Posted by Jason Aldsworth - Nasty, Sneaky but a Dumb Arse | June 15, 2009, 19:08
  41. Shardey announced her retirement. It’s in this mornings Hun.

    Posted by anon | June 16, 2009, 11:11
  42. It’s Party time in Caulfield.

    Posted by DJ Disco Dave | June 16, 2009, 11:47
  43. Kelly O’Dwyer is now running for Higgins. You are lucky McIntosh. Very very lucky.

    Posted by Anon | June 16, 2009, 11:53
  44. It is party time in Kew! Disco Dave, I need your awesome DJ skills for a celebratory function to be held later this week.

    Posted by Macca | June 16, 2009, 11:59
  45. Interesting that a mailbox drop entitled “something is wrong in Victoria” slamming and damming the ALP state govt. with spin doctoring, by MLC Jan Kronberg is on the heels of the bad press on her fellow Liberal member Richard Della-Riva!! (There is something wrong in Victoria:ie Richard Della-Riva) Clever turn around Jan, your marketing skills are soooo transparent.

    Posted by paula | June 24, 2009, 13:33
  46. Kelly O’Dwyer – what a joke.

    Posted by macgreiner | July 4, 2009, 3:11
  47. You are all bloody mad!

    Posted by swimfan | August 4, 2009, 11:44
  48. Bugger Kelly for Kew… we have her all primed for my old seat in Higgins.. the pink rinse gals out there will love her… we have talked averyone out of it..Oldsworthy Jason…Chheezed off julian..bloody Abercromble… why..why..why… fancy him believing liberals out there will exercise any choice.. thats a Menzian construct… we have our Krogsey Play book… got Hel(l)en, Ronno and Scotcha up… now for Kello

    Posted by costellokroger | August 17, 2009, 15:42
  49. mat..mate..mate..mate

    Posted by costellokroger | August 17, 2009, 15:43